MEMO: “The Order of My Words”

Sep 16, 2009 by newkindofclown    No Comments    Posted under: Thousands of Stories

MEMO:

Last night, while I was having a long conversation with my mother, a soul whom I have traveled this world with before, I saw that the moon was full. Either it was the full moon or my just having completed reading The Alchemist, or perhaps it was having come from a meeting with a man who, for whatever reason it may be, is helping me for no personal gain whatsoever. And, as I met with this man in his dark, back-room office, I felt both terror and overwhelming strength.

I felt, for the first time in my life, as if I was being seen for what I am, entirely. Its as if I finally figured out how to place all of these words that float around in my head in an order that can suddenly make sense to the rest of the world. The only way I can describe it is that it was an equal exchange of souls (as opposed to material wealth, connections, or power). After that meeting, I suddenly feel a sense of assurance: I will be okay if I follow my heart.

There is an incredible song from the 1980’s, Listen to Your Heart, that I listen to on repeat when I ride the subway. It is the only way to live.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NgICd1zImXA]
Suddenly, now that my words make sense, I am no longer worried about who it is that I am. I feel like I can now look through the walls that people put up, I can see through the gates, the road blocks, the lies, and the masks into what is true and what is right.

I seek for the good in everything and I seek my own personal legend. In order to do this you must be able to communicate with your heart. You must be able to see through the ‘Soul of the World’ and trust that your treasure is within your heart, somewhere. And now, I can see it. I can so it so clearly and so brightly that I don’t need to even worry that I don’t have vision insurance and that I just spent my last ten dollars cash to refill the laundry card.

Dear New York City,

You are a slap in the face. But a beautiful one without which I would forever remain a child. Children are dreamers but they are stuck where they are. I am a dreamer and I am now free to become who I am. For that, I thank you.

Be well,

- Emily

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